It is not about you and universal advice
During my years maturing as a manager I got a lot of advice from mentors and coaches for my own struggle handling hard reports. As I started managing other managers, directors, and VPs, I realize that some of that advice was universal; I ended up giving the same advice multiple times.
I will try to cover a few of the following anecdotes (actual content will be tweaked as I build it):
- "It is not about you" - Your reports says you are the source of all evil, misjudging their work, being unreasonable. It is more often not about you personally.
- "You will have this struggle in any reasonable place" - You are afraid pushing your report on a certain area will make them leave. Here is how you put them in a growth mindset.
- "How much can we really help here" - You are struggling with a report that wants to grow technically or as a manager, but has a lot of issues. You want to help them, give them a change leading. Here is how to not over do it.
- "Yes, we need to articulate our expectations. Again" - The key for accountability is setting the right expectations, even if you believe they are apparent. It they are apparent since you articulated them in 2018, there is a chance they are only apparent to you.
VIDEOS RELATED TO MANAGING
Christine Spang, Cofounder and CTO at Nylas
Michael Machado, Head of Product at DevRev
Jossie Haines, Executive Coach/Technical Advisor at Jossie Haines Consulting
Jesse White, Chief Technical Officer at The OpenNMS Group
Raffi Krikorian , CTO at Emerson Collective
Ron Lichty, Interim VP Eng at Ron Lichty Consulting
Matt Powell, CTO at FTD
Maher Saba, VP of Remote Presence / Head of Eng at Meta
Steven Gaffney, President and CEO at Steven Gaffney Company
Vidal Graupera, Engineering Manager — Productivity Tools UI/UX at LinkedIn
Mark Porter, CTO at MongoDB
Mindaugas Mozūras, VP of Engineering at Vinted
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